CONGRADS! Great story – thanks so much for sharing! enjoy planning a wedding.

Merrill

A few weeks ago, I was in NY for a business trip that ended on a Friday. I extended my stay over the weekend so that I could spend some time with my daughter, Evie, who is now working and living on Long Island as a Personal Banker for Chase.

Evie had to work on Saturday, so her boyfriend Joe (a Mets fan)and I went into the City Saturday morning. Evie planned to meet us there after 4:00.

I chose a place I had read about on Second Ave and 14th St called Professor Thom’s (http://www.professorthoms.com/professorthoms.html). I had never been to the place before, but had heard about it. You see, Professor Thom’s is not just any ordinary sports bar; it’s a Red Sox bar, deep in the heart of enemy territory. It is indeed a wonderful establishment:
Red Sox memorabilia and 17 widescreen TVs all over the place (every booth has its own small widescreen TV); Celtics, Patriots and UMASS banners behind the bar. Suffice it to say, if there’s a sports bar in heaven, it looks just like Professor Thom’s.

Joe and I went to the bar and ordered the brunch special. I struck up a
conversation with the manager about Boston and UMASS and he bought us a drink. We were on our third beer when we looked up at the TV screen. The Sox weren’t on (they were playing the evening game), but the Yankees were and they were losing. Then (Yankee pitcher) C.C. Sabathia gave up a double to (LA Angel outfielder) Torii Hunter that scored two runs and made the Angel’s lead even wider.

And there in the light of the TV, surrounded by Red Sox memorabilia, knowing that the Sox led the American League East and the Yankees were losing and sitting directly across from the UMASS banner behind the bar, Joe asked for my permission to marry Evie. How could I refuse?

Never underestimate the value of knowing the right time to ask…

Thanks Morgan!

With Love Daddy.

Ok I must admit something to all of you. I got home last night after being away for a few days and after I said hello to everyone my little girl had me doing ballet with her. No I am not that flexible at all and almost ripped a hamstring but I did the best I could and had a blast!

Still not sure about playing dolls or putting on makeup but who knows I might just do that as well!

Merrill

Merrill, thanks for the compliments. I am reminded here of Boston-based folk singer John Lincoln Wright, who wrote a tribute to his father that includes the lines:

“He made fans of all of us,
As only fathers can…”

Thanks for responding. Catie is great – yes I have enjoyed meeting her and discussing baseball in Arlington. She is a terrific girl – you guys have done a great job. For the record you get extra points for making sure she is a Red Sox fan!

Stay warm.

Merrill

But Catie and Evie have turned out to be even better than those wishful pipe dreams.

Most of the posts seem to be from the girl’s point of view but the view from the male side is great too. Yeah, there were some Maalox moments during the teen years, but I always tried to adjust my discipline to the personality of the girl.

I can’t remember playing with dolls, but I do remember putting the Barbie Dream house together (and having to order missing parts from Mattel).

One of the things I love as a parent is sharing your passions and enthusiasms with your kids. They don’t always pick up on them (and that’s OK, you want them to be independent thinkers). When Evie was 4 we had a private ritual. A cookie company mad graham cracker cookies that were based on MLB teams. They were about the size of a silver dollar and the American League was chocolate and the National League was Vanilla and each cookie had the insignia of one of the teams. Whenever we would get a cookie with the Yankee insignia, we would crush it in our hands before eating it. SO one day, I’m at work and my wife is home with Evie and gives her a cookie. Its a Yankee cookie and she says she doesn’t want it. My wife tells her there’s nothing wrong with it and to eat it. She crushes the cookie and is sent to time out for being disobedient. When I get home, I find out about the incident and explain the ritual to my wife. She is not pleased (Typically when I tell this story to women they say “That’s terrible, you’re sending out mixed signals”; and when I tell the story to men they say “Way to go, you’re raising her right”, but I digress0.

Caitie has a very quick wit and catches on to my jokes quicker than anyone else in the family (including my brothers and their families). We have developed a hand sign (pointing our fingers at each other) as our way of saying “the others haven’t caught on yet”. We also reference favorite punch lines and scenes from favorite movies and TV shows (like Chef’s father on SOuthPark warning against the Loch Ness Monster wanting to borrow $3.50–we crack each other all the time–I know you’re probably saying “What????” I guess you had to be there).

What I love about being the father of Daddy’s Girls is the trust they place in you and the way they come to you for help. Building the Barbie Dream House; cheering them up after losing a soccer game (God, how I miss those games!). Helping them start on the road to life. Seeing them become independent, but knowing deep down inside we are still there for each other and seeing a part of yourself in them. There’s nothing like it.

P.S. As bad as the Swifer idea was, they meant well! And more importantly I was not in charge! haha : )

That said, my brother could get away with 10 times more bad behavior than I could. Dad might have given me extra cash, and a trip to Rome, and bought me a stereo system just on my saying it was nice… but if I stayed out too late or worried them with a boyfriend, forget about it. Something that MIGHT have resulted in my brother getting a talking-to (or not) got me in serious trouble.

I think we both learned to deal with it. It wasn’t “fair” but goodness, we are human beings, and it’s hard enough raising one child (I should know) let alone two who are always comparing and note-taking and counting everything you do for fairness. My parents tried to be “fair” and maybe that’s as close as it gets!

However, I never felt I was taking advantage of my dad. Maybe that comes from the respect that was built into the relationship. I didn’t get anything by demanding it or stamping my feet… I got it because he loved me and wanted to do nice things for me, and I was a good kid. Had I acted up, I guarantee I would have been in for a rude awakening.

Treat her right. Love her. Spoil her a little. But don’t ever let it go to her head or let her think that she can act however she wants and still get spoiled. If she respects you, I think you’ve got it made and have a great relationship to come for decades and decades.

Enjoy!