The Merrill Dubrow Blog

Usually I don’t write any of the blogs during the week; I tend to write them on Sunday. But today is different based on a few things that have happened recently.

One night I went to work out; it was around 8:00 PM. Let me define my workout. It consists of running/walking on the treadmill for about 35 minutes and saying good-bye to about 375 calories. I look forward to working out because besides burning off 100 or so more calories than the one coke I drink during the day, I can catch up on my reading, watch a little TV and frankly enjoy a little quiet time.

Six minutes into my workout I hear someone over my right shoulder say, “Is Tory Holt picked? What about Chad Johnson?”

At first, I thought he was talking to me, so I tried to bend my body like a pretzel to see if I could see him. No luck at all.

Then he says, “Okay. I will take Marvin Harrison.”

This went on for about another 30 minutes until I left. The 26 year old behind me was on the elliptical machine while he was on a call for his fantasy football draft.

In the past month these occurrences have all happened in my presence:

• While I was watching the movie Invincible, a person who was seated about five feet to my right answered her phone and spoke to someone for 4 minutes
• Two people in a NY elevator were on the phone at the same time—for the entire trip of 32 floors down to the lobby
• I have been in the restroom while someone was on the phone in a stall
• I have been having dinner at a very nice restaurant while someone was on the phone speaking very, very loudly

And my favorite from the last month:

• Someone was actually on the Hertz bus screaming at his administrative assistant for messing up his travel plans

I understand multi-tasking. In fact, part of our hiring criteria at M/A/R/C is to be a solid muli-tasker. I would consider myself a good multi-tasker.

I just believe there is a time and place for all of this “need to be available 24/7” and believe this is beyond out of control. Drew Barrymore in the movie Fever Pitch references a boyfriend she had who didn’t like how much she was on the phone and took her cell phone and tossed it away.

Everyone thinks they have an important job and I am NO different, but when I reviewed the last 10 calls I made, 6 could have waited. My sense is that most people are the same. I am all for taking a call in public if it is an emergency but calls like:

• What are you doing tonight?
• I can’t believe Rich didn’t call you!
• Sorry to hear you will miss the big game

These calls don’t sound like they qualify as emergencies in my book.

With unlimited cell phone usage, I believe things will get a lot worse before they get better.

“No cell phone” areas will pop up everywhere in the next year. To me that is a good thing.

There might be some who don’t understand what bugs me about all this.

• Am I bothered by an invasion of my privacy?
• Am I irritated because of my lost quiet time at the gym?
• Am I annoyed because I pay good money for an enjoyable dinner or night at the movies, only to have the experience ruined because of a lack of common courtesy?
• Am I upset at myself for sometimes doing the same thing?

Actually, it’s all of the above.

Am I the only one bothered by this? I look forward to your comments and stories.

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Tomorrow is supposed to be another beautiful day in the State of Texas. A September day in Boston usually meant the end of softball season. But in Southlake, Texas, it is now the beginning of another season.

I have been playing baseball/softball as far back as I remember. Don’t laugh, but I still have my team stats and trophy from the 1970 peanut league championship I was part of in Framingham, MA. No I am not a packrat, but sports—specifically baseball—are very important to me. (By the way I had 5 RBI’s that year which wasn’t that good except I did that without the benefit of a hit. I had mastered the art of either striking out or walking at the age of eight.)

Back to 2006. I am now in an over 35 league. (Yes, I also qualify for an over 40 league!) The guys are great and the league is a ton of fun.

As the game gets closer I get more and more excited. For some reason, the first game in any sport I play is special. Maybe it’s because all the teams start off at the same point and you need to work hard to separate your team from the rest.

Besides getting more and more excited, something else happens.

We are playing in the first game tomorrow—the 7:00 game. Also, we are listed first on the schedule which means our team is the visiting team. Since 99% of the time my coach leads me off, I am up first. So what does all this mean? (Get to your point.)

Well the “something else that happens” is I am ALWAYS very nervous for my first “at bat” of a new season. My heart is pumping a little more, my hair is standing up on my arms and I am chewing my five pieces of double bubble faster than at a normal game.

Am I alone?

• I have a number of friends that play golf in club championships. Do they get nervous on the first tee?

• Do moderators get nervous the first three minutes of a focus group?

• Do research managers get a little nervous writing a report for a new client?

• Do new business development teams get nervous speaking to and meeting strangers week after week?

• How nervous are you on a job interview?

• Remember way back when: how nervous were you meeting your girlfriend’s/boyfriend’s parents for the first time

Everyone gets nervous in some way, shape or form.

• How long does it last?
• How do you overcome it?
• What are your secrets?

We want to hear from you. I will share what works for me after a number of people respond.

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I remember when I was in my 20’s hearing that if your salary was your age, you were doing well. I think in my 30’s people would say if you were making 2–3 times your age you were doing really well. A number of investment companies have said if you save 10% of your salary you are doing great and much better than the average person. I often wonder if I have saved enough at this stage of my life. Did I have too much fun in my early years and because of that will work until I am 88?

One thing is for sure: whatever I didn’t save in those years is behind me, and I can never get it back.

I find discussions about money and savings very difficult. In my life there are maybe three friends I could have those types of conversations with. My sense is that most people are in the same boat. Of course I could have the conversation with my mom and dad, but no matter how much I have saved, it isn’t enough in their eyes.

A few weeks ago I was reading an article that I thought was very interesting, and I found it helped me answer these questions:

1. How am I doing?
2. Have I saved enough?
3. How do I compare against other people?

VIP Forum, a Washington-based group that researches wealth and wealth management practices, does the number crunching to create The Wealth Scoreboard. The basic data comes from The Survey of Consumer Finances, a survey done every three years by the Federal Reserve. The last survey was in 2004.

THE WEALTH SCOREBOARD

The table shows the median net worth for households as of 2004, arranged by age of the chief wage earner. To find your rank, go to the appropriate age category and find the net worth closest to yours (dollars in thousands):

I hope you find this chart very useful. I know I have.

Please post any comments you have regarding any financial metrics you have heard over the years or best practices that work for you.

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It’s a quiet Sunday morning in Southlake, Texas. The birds are chirping, the sun is rising, we are on our way to another 100+ degrees day and I am reading the Dallas Morning News. As I come across Parade Magazine I notice a few women—Amanda, Amy and Zora. Each of them is featured in “before and after” pictures, and each of them “lost a bunch of weight with NutriSystem.”

Over the years I have had friends and family who have been on Jenny Craig, Weight Watchers and of course the highly publicized Atkins Diet. Most of them lost weight but unfortunately a few moths later, they put it right back on.

Like most people entering their late 30’s and early 40’s, I put on an extra 3 pounds a year. Finally after a number of years I found myself the heaviest I had ever been—195 pounds! Yes, my pants were very tight and my suits didn’t fit. The only good news was that getting dressed in the morning was very easy since I didn’t have a ton of choices in the “larger clothing” section of my closet. I thought about going on a number of different diet programs but decided that they wouldn’t work for me.

Finally I made a decision while I was on a business trip with a colleague, Tim Antoniewicz. I remember like it was yesterday. The date was June 22, 2004, and we were in between sales appointments and were a little hungry. With not a lot of time on our hands, we ran into a Mobil gas station and walked out with a soda, a Slim Jim and a bag of chips—a real healthy lunch! Since I am not a coffee drinker I would have no less than 8 regular sodas a day. A typical dinner for me was a soda and my favorite microwave popcorn Pop Secret Homestyle while I was watching the Red Sox games late at night.

So instead of the South Beach Diet, Suzanne Somers Diet, Grapefruit Diet, The Warrior Diet or the other 300 diets that are listed on Google I decided to create my own.

Since June 22, 2004, I changed three things:

1.	I have limited my consumption to 1 (yes I said 1) Coke a day in the afternoon.
2.	I drink tons of water—probably 100 ounces a day
3.	I try not to eat after 8:00 PM

At first I was very concerned about giving up soda. For about three or four days, I did have migraine headaches. Aside from that, the only real change I noticed was the need to go to the restroom much more often. Otherwise, there were no big changes in my life. I am not working out that much more, and rest assured if you haven’t had lunch with me, I have a healthy appetite.

For me, the results have worked. Over the next 26 months I lost 21 pounds and have kept it off. In fact I lost 20 pounds in the first 5 months.

No my diet doesn’t have a name (that I know of). Maybe it should be “The I was in Baltimore with Tim and didn’t feel good” diet. This change worked for me. Since New Years resolutions are right around the corner, maybe this or something like it can work for you.

Please let us know your thoughts.

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